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The Michael Swayne Story V: King of his Castle

A perk of being a polyglot...

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Story Time!

I was told to wash the van today by my boss. I was not excited about it at all, because on Thursdays I work for the newspaper, not GE. Well, I finally got around to it just a little bit ago. I bring all of the supplies to the van, and get ready to begin. Only, there is no water spigot at the back of the house. Just great, I think. I take all of the supplies to the front of the house, and hope that the hose can reach the front driveway. Then I drive the van around front to begin washing it.

As soon as I get the water in the bucket and start rinsing the van off, it starts raining. Wonderful! But I had already started, so I hoped for it to be over quickly, and that it would start back up after everything was all soapy. That way, I wouldn't have to do as much work. So I wash the majority of the van, leaving the top and racks alone because I am not going to do that without a ladder. Everything is all nice and clean on the outside, so I put away the soap and reel the hose back in, and put everything in the shed. Then, I start the van back up, and put it back where I always park it, in the back driveway.

Only, during the time of me washing the van, some idiot goes and parks his car in my driveway! Seriously! Someone had the nerve to enter my property without my permission and park their car in my driveway! Well, wet and sweaty Michael is not having any of that! I lay on the horn and wait. I did stop while they stared at me. I didn't stop as the walked out to the road. Or as they crossed it and entered my property. No, I finally stopped the noise when I was back where I have parked that van since the very first day I had it, in my back driveway. The guy (I don't know his name, because I don't care enough to be a good neighbor) said something to me, but I didn't hear him. It is kind of hard to hear someone talking to you when you are blaring your car horn and shouting in a combination of English, Spanish, Mandarin, Japanese, Korean, Italian, Russian, and Icelandic, and some few choices gestures from American Sign Language how much of F-wad they are being for trespassing on your property and using your driveway as a public parking area.

After I am back where things in my world are nice again, I get started with cleaning the inside of the van. I clean the windows, and the dashboard. The doors get cleaned as well. I clean up the floor as well, because I have not taken out the old newspapers in a couple weeks. I even put the seat cover on that I found behind the passenger seat.

It is clean enough to suit my tastes, but I honestly don't care about what my boss thinks about it. What my employer at GE needs to realize is that he is only my boss from 7am to 3:30pm on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday. If he wants me to work for him work than that, then he better start paying me more. I mean, the eight hours I work for the Messenger gets me $105 each week, or $13.13 (I rounded up) per hour. Not only that, I get to sleep in on Thursdays, and not have to actually do the work until I decide to. If GE wanted to raise my pay to equal that after taxes are taken out, then maybe I would consider leaving the newspaper. But until then, I am an HVAC technician four days a week, and a bicycling paperboy one day a week.

Well, that's all for now. I hope to see you around the forums, and until then...



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