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12-20-2007, 02:04 PM
| Level: 16 | HP: 30 / 393 |
| EXP: 72% |
|  | #1 (permalink) | ||
 Join Date: Sep 2006 
Posts
320 |
The Snow Falls Again... The snow falls again A fluffy frosting Hugging the world But what of the people? Only buried underneath Layer after layer. I stand sinking, Seeing strangers shaking hands Feeling foolish but a little hopeful Reality, never so kind But despair seems too sad Will you be sinking? Or standing with arms outreached? Feeling the fear? Or embracing it? Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year A message to all that stand, Grasp hold of the hand that you love And never let go. Because you never know when they will slip away.. Beneath the snow… Merry Christmas Everyone =] Hope you liked my new piece of work. Feed me back =] | ||||||||
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12-21-2007, 02:21 AM
| Level: 10 | HP: 18 / 239 |
| EXP: 58% |
|  | #2 (permalink) | ||
 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Australia
Posts
133  | Absolutely brilliant. Honestly it's really lovely, wonderful depth and composure. Well done.
__________________ <img src="http://img86.imageshack.us/img86/9935/set8siglj3.jpg" border="0"> | ||||||||
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12-21-2007, 10:58 AM
| Level: 25 | HP: 263 / 610 |
| EXP: 43% |
|  | #3 (permalink) | ||
| Secret mod of the COD  Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Broken Arrow, OK
Posts
798  | i liked it alot keep em coming merry christmas to you too!
__________________  Member of the FF Cult! You only wish you could be... Currently Playing: Final Fantasy VI Stage of game: WoR - Just got the Airship Average party level: 29 Current Party: Celes, Sabin, Edgar, and Setzer | ||||||||
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12-22-2007, 08:48 AM
| Level: 42 | HP: 226 / 1037 |
| EXP: 50% |
|  | #4 (permalink) | ||
 Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Offscreen
Posts
2,899  | Haunting, with the lightest touch of lyricism. I like it. It could use some general tightening up, but overall I think it's fairly good. The only comment I have content-wise has to do with the fear the narrator is referring to. What is the fear of? It's not clearly defined. I thought maybe it's loneliness but I'm not positive. The imagery with the second verse is nice, but I think it makes the first feel a little too soft. More precisely, the first three lines. The tone is at odds with the rest of the piece. Other than that, very enjoyable. Thank you for sharing.  ~DragonHeart~
__________________  Click the banner to enter the You Spoony Bard! Fanworks Contest Family: Psiko, Toph Bei Fong, Djinn | ||||||||
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