Cheating In A Relationship - Page 2

penelo rocks · 05-04-2006, 11:41 AM

i do agree with some of things that have been said in this topic i for one would never cheat on anyone as i have been cheated by my girlfriend and i know the pain and the thinking of "why was i 2nd best to someone else" and also the thinking that you have somthing wrong with you weither it be looks or personality because your partner for somereason rejected you and its hard to get into another relationship because you dont want to get hurt.

VIVI17 · 05-04-2006, 02:04 PM

I've never cheated on anyone. I've been cheated on though. it sucks so much when you find out

Hecate · 05-05-2006, 07:21 PM

I've been cheated on MANY times, a girl even called me telling me to stay away from my boyfriend because he was hers....I confronted him about it and he eventually fessed up and didn't know what to do. I told him if he was serious about me to ditch her, 'cause if not then I would be the one gone. He wasn't right in the head anyway, went suicidal both times I broke up with him and landed himself in the hospital (mental) because he didn't want to lose me. I told him he shouldn't have cheated on me and continued to after I gave him another chance. He was still trying to get me back when I was dating Tom, and pregnant with Tom's kid too, and he and David's ex were the reason David broke up with me, though we're back together now.

I only cheated once, but it was meant to be. I was dating this guy for 21 months during the time we were 15-16 years old...and I knew our relationship was doomed anyway. But the guy I cheated on him with....I don't wanna talk about.....'cause he ended up dieing anyway (hence why my son's name is Wesley).

But I think if you cheat only once or twice while you're young then that's one thing, but if it's a repeated act no matter who they're with, and it goes into their 20's, then they'll probably ALWAYS be cheaters, and even if they try to be serious, they'll either cheat anyway or won't be able to get a girl because of his known cheating, or manipulate two girls into loving him so much that even though they know he's cheating, AND MARRIED, neither will let go of him (my friend is in this situation).

And I heard that 90-something percent of married men and women end up having at least one affair, but the statistics for men and affairs are higher than that of women. (that doesn't mean women don't cheat)

Tiffany · 05-08-2006, 06:03 AM

I've been cheated on. I've never cheated though.

I'm of the opinon that if you're a cheater (even if it's only once) then you have NO right to bitch about other people doing it. You're doing it as well!

It hurt like hell to be cheated on, especially because it was with his ex girlfriend. I felt like such an idiot after finding out. How stupid could I be? I don't agree with the "once a cheater, always a cheater" bit, but I do believe that once the trust is shattered, it's next to impossible (at least with me) to get it back.

Amphitrite · 05-08-2006, 07:02 AM

Ive been cheated on quite a few times, It sucks. But then I met my boyfriend and I cheated on him with my X. Which I wouldve never done before. Thankfully my boyfriend forgave me and weve been together for 6 months. I WILL never cheat on him again. EVER. So I guess you cant say once a cheater always a cheater, but it depends on the person. If they do it because they think they're a pimp, then theyll probly do it again. Because their blinded anyway. I think its wrong in any situation.

And if you do it your a slut...which I guess Im bashing myself but hey, it was a dirty, slutty, selfish thing to do to him.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JET

I just go to crazy partys, where I always get stuck talking to drunk, horny girls. It's not bad, but It isn't easy on me either.

Ummmm....just a question, why do you put yourself in those situations. If you loved someone, why would you want to be with a bunch of horny drunk girls.

Hecate · 05-08-2006, 07:13 AM

When I cheated, nothing sexual was involved. I wasn't sexually active yet back then. I had been raped when I was 14 and waited till I was about 17 to do anything with the boyfriend I was with at that time. I went through many relationships without having sex. My 21-month relationship never had sex involved, and that guy is still a virgin at the age of 20 now. Too bad he started drinking.

But yeah, the one time I cheated, had nothing sexual about it, therefore calling people who "cheat" a slut isn't really correct, because sluts are girls who just go around to have sex, and MANY cheaters aren't like that. I know quite a few who are, but not everyone is.

*Chez Daja* · 05-08-2006, 07:20 AM

Seriously. I was cheated on once. Only once. But it hurt like ****.

"So I'm just some second hander, eh?" ... Blugh. I'm glad nothing sexual was involved in that "relationship" if you can even call it that. If you really love somebody, you won't full on cheat on them. Meh. They'll be temptations or offers, and if you're in a rough patch, it can be hard to know WHAT the **** you want. Believe me. I've almost ****ing ending the only good thing that happened to me over a small rough patch. If you love somebody, you should work on shit with them, rather then ignoring the problem and then let it grow... But yeah... I would never cheat on anybody... I find it hard enough to trust people. Why would I want to put anybody through what I've been through?

I don't care if they're young or old. Nobody deserves to be cheated on, except for the cheater. But then there'd be a never ending loop of cheaters, so I take that back.

Meh... Not a great topic for me. Just reminds me of what started off a lot of shit, to be honest.

Tiffany · 05-08-2006, 07:22 AM

Cheating is cheating is cheating. I don't care if it's kissing or full-blown intercourse. It's wrong IMO.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that someone's a slut if they do it, but I will question their character of a person and their morals. You can't have your cake and eat it too, so be the BETTER person and break up with the other person first. Then go off and do whatever your heart desires.

It's not fair to the other person. If you really want to be ****ing around with someone else, then it can wait for the 3 mins or so to make a phonecall and say "it's over". If you say it's not that easy, then well... you shouldn't be ****ing around with the other person in the first place.

JMO.

*Chez Daja* · 05-08-2006, 07:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tiffany

Cheating is cheating is cheating. I don't care if it's kissing or full-blown intercourse. It's wrong IMO.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that someone's a slut if they do it, but I will question their character of a person and their morals. You can't have your cake and eat it too, so be the BETTER person and break up with the other person first. Then go off and do whatever your heart desires.

It's not fair to the other person. If you really want to be ****ing around with someone else, then it can wait for the 3 mins or so to make a phonecall and say "it's over". If you say it's not that easy, then well... you shouldn't be ****ing around with the other person in the first place.

JMO.

Amen to that.

I hate when people just screw others over because they want to... Why would anybody hurt somebody else like that? It's madness... I'll never understand it...

Tiffany · 05-08-2006, 07:30 AM

I can totally tell that you know exactly where I'm comming from Chez. It does hurt like hell, doesn't it?

I wish my b/f would have broken up with me first, rather than to cheat on me and then for me to find out from his ex-girlfriend. Fun! It was like the one thing that I swore would never happen, did.

I know alot of people don't believe me when I say this, but I'm a HUGE fan of honesty. I can't say I'd be jumping for joy if my guy were to tell me that he cheated, but I would have the utmost respect for him for being enough of a man to tell me what he did. I abhor hearing info from second-hand sources.

I'd still break up with him, but I wouldn't loathe him for not only cheating on me, but hiding it from me as well. If you can cheat, you can also be accountable for your actions. I hold NO SYMPATHY WHATSOEVER to people who cheat. Sorry, I don't. It all goes back to my "can't have your cake and eat it too" and I don't think anyone in this universe will be able to convince me that it was 'okay' in their situation or blah blah blah.

*Chez Daja* · 05-08-2006, 07:39 AM

Yeah, to have a guy tell you the truth is a lot better... I hate hearing it from one of his friends or something. I loathe Chris for what he did, and since he was my first "boyfriend", it hurts even more to know that I couldn't even hold up a relationship without failing miserably in it.

In the end, I learnt not to blame myself, since he'd cheated on fifteen others before me... No respect for any man or woman that cheats... It's even worse when you can't throw scissors at them or something.

Err... not that I'd do that... Hahaha...

>.>

<.<

>.>

Hecate · 05-08-2006, 08:24 AM

When I cheated on Brodie, he was glad of it, 'cause he fessed up he liked someone else anyway. When you're young, you don't have the maturity level to really know better....thus after it happens to you, you won't do it anymore.

I've been cheated on by just about every boyfriend I had.....and did it hurt me any? No...because they proved to me they weren't the ones for me so I could move on and continue my search. After Brodie, though, if I saw a guy who I thought was better for me than the guy I was with, I would break it off before going with the new guy. It's been years since I went guy-hopping, but I'm happy with my current boyfriend and neither of us know anyone better suited for us than eachother.

Tiffany · 05-08-2006, 08:39 AM

Of course they didn't hurt that much. You were young. Wait until you get older and the stakes are higher. And I don't mean current age, I mean ooooolder

Wait until you find the guy you think you're going to marry, and you invest YEARS of your life with him, buy stuff togeather, live togeather blah blah blah. THEN have him cheat on you and tell me how it feels.

I wouldn't have cared if I was 17. Hell I wouldn't have cared if I was 22. But when you are older, the stakes are higher and it hurts a helluva lot more.

ash2k · 05-08-2006, 08:41 AM

I have had g/fs in the past and I have never cheated on them I just usually wanna be with that person so I don't see why u would wanna cheat I don't understand it if you don't wanna be with that person then don't be with them end of story

*Chez Daja* · 05-08-2006, 08:43 AM

Tiffany. I wasnt even seventeen when my first boyfriend "cheated" on me. But it still hurt to know that there was somebody else.

My mother always told me I grew up pretty fast. I'm also apparently a "passionately emotional" person. I don't know if that's good, but I'm guessing not in the department of love. I hate to know what my current boyfriend has to put up with, what with my constant affectionate...ness.

I think some people just hurt more then others in these types of things. It'll always have some kind of emtional pain if you care, at least a little bit for the person that cheats on you. I've only been with my current boyfriend for about a year and five-ish months, but I care for him a lot, and I'd hate for anything to happen to us... I trust him not to hurt me as badly as Chris did, though.